R-15 06: My body will never be ready (probably not what you think it is)

…

A long time ago, when I was reviewing Sekai-Ichi Hatsukoi, I said that I would be open to reviewing Bara anime.

I thought that if I could handle Yaoi, I could eventually handle Bara.

…

How mistaken I was.

Oh the humanity.

I actually think I’ve been mentally scarred. I’ve been going through my movie list to try and overwrite my short-term memory, but now whenever I look at any male actor, even a random male passerby, I actually shiver involuntarily.

Rationally speaking though, why hasn’t anyone used this as a form of enhanced interrogation?

A session of hot oily man-loving can’t cause any permanent physical trauma, after all.

I guarantee you that within 15 seconds of having their faces in direct contact with the speedo-bound genitalia of bodybuilders, any straight man will be confessing his crimes all the way back into 3rd grade.

Commandos and Navy SEALS and other special operatives will last 1 minute at most.

GOOD END

But no. Just, no.

I had plans to review the Sekai-Ichi OVAs when they were released, but I don’t think I can watch Yaoi after this. I don’t even think I can look at another guy without cringing for the next 72 hours.

ANYWAY, GIRLS.

Our mysterious cheerleader girl is finally revealed to be Genius Manager, Kurabu Katsuyo. That explains why she failed at cheerleading so much.

But having watched Moshidora, this little bit of parody was hilarious. I was caught up in the story (seriously after having a main character die I’d have accepted any deviations from reality) but now I can see how improbable the triumphant ending was.

I’m surprised Taketo didn’t start fantasizing about Katsuyo managing her team and giving them moral support, if you know what I mean. Certainly I’m surprised that there’s so little Moshidora Rule34 material.

But even if her attempts to inspire Taketo make for rather fail fanservice, Taketo’s imagination more than makes up for it.

Uncensored release where.

I seem to have started liking Raika (again?). Maybe it’s because she’s more of a tease than a bitch now.

Maybe it was my confession that I liked dress shirts that subconsciously cleared up my tsuntsun attitude towards her.

Or maybe it was those muscle-things that made me view Raika in a whole new light: that she is hot, is cute, and most importantly is a woman.

In a more traditional interpretation of ‘my body will never be ready’, I heartily approve of this pairing.

Fukune is the true end, sure – but Utae is just as pretty, cute, and heart-crushingly pure of heart. Guys, if a girl ever makes a bento for you, marry her.

Utae trying to hide the bandages on her fingers from not being too good around the kitchen = rapid increase in cardiac muscle contractions.

UTAE-CHAN HNNNGH

That Katsuyo.

I’m trying hard not to hate her, but after she ruined that particular moment I really did want to smash her face in with a brick.

Taketo no doubt feels the same way ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)

/temporarily-boarding-the-rageface-bandwagon

Utae-chan makes the most hard hitting sad faces in this anime.

It’s definitely on par with Mari-chan’s “Onee-chan, life is sour.”

Fukune-chan gets really little screentime in this episode. I suppose that even though she’s the eventual romantic interest winner, the anime’s got to fulfil its harem designation obligations.

But you know what’s really unforgivable? No Stark-chan in this whole episode. The worst part is that there isn’t even any fanart of her that I could sate my withdrawal with. Rule34 fails me.

Reused end card is not fail, but not win either. Tsukuru episode where.